So you’re back at Varsity and you are seeing friends that you haven’t spoken to in ages, its great!
You’re floating on a high, strutting across Plaza like it nobodies business(it probably isn’t… Also, stop strutting, it looks weird) when suddenly you get blindsided by and “acquaintance”! Oh no! What will you talk about? Panic!
But never fear because I am here with this handy bit of small talk to get you through even the toughest of awkward encounters:
Random Person: Hey Richard! How are you? (How do they always remember my name?!)
Me(or you): Hey [Insert name, or if name is in doubt, "dude" or "you"], great thanks and yourself?
Random Person: I’m just aaaamazing, had such and amazing holiday, I went to [amazing sounding place that you can't even dream of going to] with [person you've never met], was so much fun and we where practically [drunk, high or suntanning depending on the person] the whole time! How was yours?
This is generally where things get a bit awkward, but don’t worry, I’ve got your back.
Me: Thats great, I’ve always wanted to goto [place]. I didn’t do much, just [boring in comparison thing that you did].
Random Person: That’s a pity, you should have come to [place] (wtf, I barely even know you!)
Now this is probably where the conversation would taper off to an awkward silence with one of you making a lame excuse to move off, but hold in there a little longer! Its time to drop the small talk bombshell!
Me: Maybe next time (insert laughter here). So, did you goto any World Cup games?
Now you can just smile and nod while they list all 20 games that they went to, while you think about more important things like whether you remembered to put underwear on this morning in your sleepy daze.
Finally when you want to extricate yourself:
Me: Listen [person] I’ve goto run, my lecture is starting soon (points at watch), was great chatting to you!
Random Person: OMG ya! I really want to speak to you soon because your smalltalk skills are so amazing (they may not actually say this, but yo can bet they are thinking it!)
So there we go folks, stick to this script and you’l be able to cruise past every shallow greeting leaving only a wake of awesomeness behind you!
Generic Greeting
So you’re back at Varsity and you are seeing friends that you haven’t spoken to in ages, its great!
You’re floating on a high, strutting across Plaza like it nobodies business(it probably isn’t… Also, stop strutting, it looks weird) when suddenly you get blindsided by and “acquaintance”! Oh no! What will you talk about? Panic!
But never fear because I am here with this handy bit of small talk to get you through even the toughest of awkward encounters:
Random Person: Hey Richard! How are you? (How do they always remember my name?!)
Me(or you): Hey [Insert name, or if name is in doubt, "dude" or "you"], great thanks and yourself?
Random Person: I’m just aaaamazing, had such and amazing holiday, I went to [amazing sounding place that you can't even dream of going to] with [person you've never met], was so much fun and we where practically [drunk, high or suntanning depending on the person] the whole time! How was yours?
Me: Thats great, I’ve always wanted to goto [place]. I didn’t do much, just [boring in comparison thing that you did].
Random Person: That’s a pity, you should have come to [place] (wtf, I barely even know you!)
Me: Maybe next time (insert laughter here). So, did you goto any World Cup games?
Me: Listen [person] I’ve goto run, my lecture is starting soon (points at watch), was great chatting to you!
Random Person: OMG ya! I really want to speak to you soon because your smalltalk skills are so amazing (they may not actually say this, but yo can bet they are thinking it!)
So there we go folks, stick to this script and you’l be able to cruise past every shallow greeting leaving only a wake of awesomeness behind you!